You know when you are watching a movie and there are a hero and a villain? When the villain makes that coy smile behind the scene or the evil laugh that bellows through the halls, that is similar to narcissist duping delight. Much like pure joy in being evil, the only way to survive and rise above is to know the signs before you get duped.
Although narcissism has nearly become synonymous with selfishness, they are completely different attributes and entirely different creatures. A person who has true Narcissistic Personality Disorder doesn’t just make you a little miserable when around them.
They have a personality disorder that will rob you of everything you once believed to be true, twist it, turn it, and if you let them, leave nothing left of your soul – no I am not just being dramatic! The reason that most of us can’t understand what narcissistic duping delight is, is because the average person couldn’t even fathom relishing in something so completely destructive.
What is a Narcissistic Personality?
A true narcissist is someone who has something called Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Their goal in life is to manipulate people purely for their own gain or pleasure. They have no empathy, or ability to walk in someone else’s shoes but themselves. Although hard to grasp, a narcissist is incapable of loving anyone the way that someone without NPD can. In practical terms, they can only love themselves and seek to fulfill only their agenda and needs.
So Why are They so Charming?
A narcissist is someone who has mastered charming the people around them to manipulate and get what they want. It is easy to get caught up in their ways of persuasion because they make you feel special. Unfortunately, they are masterful at what they do. And by the time you know what is actually going on, you are caught in their web of deceit.
What Does a Narcissist get for all of Their Troubles? Narcissistic Duping Delight, of Course
What is Narcissistic Duping Delight?
As completely horrible as it sounds, the thing that a narcissist gets out of manipulating and controlling someone is pure delight. Almost like a teenager who tells a lie and gets away with it, they literally think “I can’t believe that they fell for it”. A person who enjoys narcissist duping delight typically can’t get enough joy and pleasure out of the thrill of it.
A person without narcissistic tendencies can’t contain themselves when they experience duping delight. They smile inappropriately or their body language is in complete contrast with what they are saying. But narcissistic duping delight is much more covert and even harder to decipher. Because they are masterful at deceit, they lie right through their delight without batting an eye. After years of experience and trial and error, they aren’t about to be caught.
What are the Signs of a True Narcissist?
A true narcissist is addicted to the games and manipulation that they play. But they also feel no remorse for what they do. They don’t feel as if they are doing anything wrong by bottoming you out and making you feel crazy upset at something they have done. When caught, they engage in something called gaslighting to defuse any responsibility on their part. And they throw out all sorts of lies so that you end up questioning yourself, your recount of events, and your sanity.
Is the Person You’re With a Narcissist?
Narcissist duping delight can only be discovered when you realize the person you are dealing with is actually a narcissist. Only then can you break free from the abuse of manipulation, deceit, and being used for their own gain.
It is very difficult to break free from a narcissist. It is hard to fathom that you ever fell in love with someone who can hurt you so thoroughly. And then, make it all your fault, to begin with. In essence, you feel as if you have done something wrong and deserve how they react. That is why many people have a very hard time breaking free from narcissistic relationships; they see no way out of it.
When you are with a narcissist, they make you feel as if everything you thought you knew is wrong, including your own sanity. And in doing so, they have you question what type of person you are, whether anyone will ever love you, or if you are even lovable at all. They make you believe you are unworthy of love. And the amount of emotional pain they project onto you is overwhelming, confusing, and life-altering.
How to Tell if Someone is a Narcissist
It is hard to tell when someone is a narcissist, especially when getting to know them. They act just as anyone else would, pretending to adore you and to have empathy. But soon their true personality will start to show itself. But since your brain doesn’t work the same way, you will find ways to dismiss it. And you will make excuses for their behavior. They will probably seem to be too good to be true – and in there lies your answer; if something seems to be too good to be true, it almost always is.
The best way to spot signs of a narcissist is to listen to the inner voice that tells you something isn’t right. If your friends begin to tell you that there is something off – they are not jealous, they see what you can’t. In relationships, there is no such thing as perfection.
So, if you think someone you are with is Prince Charming and can do no wrong, proceed with caution and try to back away to gain some perspective before diving in deep. Typically, although you fall under their charms, your friends and family who love you will see right through it. You just have to heed their warnings.
Narcissists at First Appear Humble and Kind
Narcissists might at first appear to be humble and kind, but they have inflated egos that are not vulnerable as they might at first try to impress upon you. Narcissistic duping delight is found in the early stages of a relationship, but only if you aren’t already too adoring to look past them. Things like smiling slyly when lying, or being very impressed by themselves are signs. And, all the while, you will probably have a strange sense inside that you are being manipulated.
Are you a Victim of Narcissistic Abuse?
If you are the victim of narcissistic abuse, it comes to a point where you are completely manipulated and under their spell. But at the same time, you probably have an inner voice telling you something isn’t right. That is your intuition trying to tell you that something is amiss. Don’t ever ignore it!
The narcissistic personality will work long and hard to make themselves look good and to toot their own horn. They want the best things in life and always try to buddy up to the most powerful person in the room. If someone you love has that pattern, you should stop to ask yourself why. A narcissist will only choose those people in their life who foster their own agenda, do something for them, or somehow further them.
Once you are hooked, the narcissistic duping delight will only grow stronger and more powerful. They enjoy it more and more each day that they can gain more power and control over you. And the more they love it, the less you will love yourself.
Am I a Victim of Narcissistic Duping Delight?
I can’t tell you if you are a victim of narcissistic duping delight. What I can tell you is if you are researching what it is and if it is happening to you, my suggestion is that something is not right in your relationship. So many people put some much weight on trying to diagnose something to prove to them what they already know.
If you are miserable in your relationship, feel as if you are being manipulated, or just aren’t happy – it is time to get out regardless of whether what they are doing has an official name. The longer you wait, the more of your soul they will take. And it will only get harder to leave over time. You deserve to be happy, you will find someone to love, or you might find that loving yourself is more important than anything.
